Retirement and Reflection
Four years on, my participation in/leadership of seven student and department organizations ends. I have chosen for it to end here out of my own free will. I have not been coerced into doing anything. Many have asked: “Why retire? You still have one semester left.” There are many reasons and I would like to make some of them public.
First and foremost of course is the Law School Admission test. I wish to be able to fully focus on studying for it during the summertime and into the fall so that I may take it in the fall. This exam determines whether or not one gets into law school. GPAs and extra-curricular/co-curricular activities matter little when it comes to law school admissions.
Secondly, I would like to receive a full time position at St. John’s. In order to do so, I must focus fully on building bridges within the university and making sure my resume looks good. Meanwhile, I must also be sure not to have any other obligations holding me back. I mean, seven organizations was quite time consuming, even for me.
Also, I think that I am also tired. Most of the public sees the good things: the awards, the appreciation, the smiles, the well attended events, etc. However, few ever see the hundreds, if not thousands, of frustrations that go into each and every event, award or smile. Let’s take this for example: many students know that I make exclusive events for certain people. There are many people who would really like to join these events but cannot due to certain reasons that I will not get into now. Imagine hearing that one person within this exclusive group saying that she cannot attend because of menstrual pain and finding out that she was at another event a few hours later. (I would not have been as disappointed if she would have simply said that she did not wish to attend. There was another person who said she simply wanted to be elsewhere and that was fine with me. However, the fact that an excuse was made is just so disappointing). So there I am, scheduling and even providing transportation but to no avail. Of course, this is not the first time that something like this happened and I have learned not to make a big deal out of it. As my former supervisor said, “as you enter this program, your heart is made of glass but by the time you leave this program, your heart is made of steel.”I have also noticed that nobody will “take care of me” unless I take care of myself first. This is precisely what I will begin doing. For four years (more than that if you count high school), I have tried very hard to help a number of people through good times and hard times. Yes, I did enjoy doing that but there was a certain void created in the sense that I left little, if any, time for myself. I will begin to change that now. I must, as a colleague of mine at the Office of Business Affairs said, pursue what I think is best for me. There are other more personal reasons for leaving the world of extra curricular and co-curricular activities. These reasons have nothing to do with the activities or even the university itself. These reasons have no place on the web so I will write no further on the topic.I have also learned quite a bit this year. Aside from my academic work, I learned that my martial arts skill should not be used carelessly. On the 27th of April, I had a martial arts demonstration on campus and the last part was to show how people sparred in martial arts. Now, my opponent was someone who trained in Korea so I thought that he would be able to take me quite easily. Little did I know that I would hit him in the face so hard! (Joshua, I am sorry about that). There was a second opponent after him who trained with me while we were in high school. This opponent was a great fighter and was much higher level than I was while in high school, so my impression was him was that he must still be good. Needless to say, I guess I must have improved quite a bit over the last four years.
Sadly, I have also learned that there are very few people in the world who will actually keep in touch when they say that they will. Perhaps the people who say this actually mean it when they say it, however, in the end, they usually do not. Maybe they’re not able to for legitimate reasons. Acquiring the skill of not being too emotionally attached to any one person or organization has been forced upon me through the experiences that I have had throughout my years. I have also learned not to let the disappointment of this fact hold me back.
Before this begins to sound like something very negative, I would like to emphasize that I have come along many people who are inherently good and wish to contribute to society along with friends. These men and women have been the inspiration for what I have done throughout my college career; from the bottom of my heart, I thank you all.
Please do not be sad that I have chosen to leave. Remember that today you might be sad but life goes on! Like any other leader, I will also be forgotten and others will outshine me. I pray for the day that many students on campus do more than what I have done and accomplish everything that I had failed to accomplish. If this happens, then there will be hope for the next generation and great prospects for society. The Asian Pacific Community especially needs more active students. Please, go out there, learn the game, and lead.
Farewell and good luck!
First and foremost of course is the Law School Admission test. I wish to be able to fully focus on studying for it during the summertime and into the fall so that I may take it in the fall. This exam determines whether or not one gets into law school. GPAs and extra-curricular/co-curricular activities matter little when it comes to law school admissions.
Secondly, I would like to receive a full time position at St. John’s. In order to do so, I must focus fully on building bridges within the university and making sure my resume looks good. Meanwhile, I must also be sure not to have any other obligations holding me back. I mean, seven organizations was quite time consuming, even for me.
Also, I think that I am also tired. Most of the public sees the good things: the awards, the appreciation, the smiles, the well attended events, etc. However, few ever see the hundreds, if not thousands, of frustrations that go into each and every event, award or smile. Let’s take this for example: many students know that I make exclusive events for certain people. There are many people who would really like to join these events but cannot due to certain reasons that I will not get into now. Imagine hearing that one person within this exclusive group saying that she cannot attend because of menstrual pain and finding out that she was at another event a few hours later. (I would not have been as disappointed if she would have simply said that she did not wish to attend. There was another person who said she simply wanted to be elsewhere and that was fine with me. However, the fact that an excuse was made is just so disappointing). So there I am, scheduling and even providing transportation but to no avail. Of course, this is not the first time that something like this happened and I have learned not to make a big deal out of it. As my former supervisor said, “as you enter this program, your heart is made of glass but by the time you leave this program, your heart is made of steel.”I have also noticed that nobody will “take care of me” unless I take care of myself first. This is precisely what I will begin doing. For four years (more than that if you count high school), I have tried very hard to help a number of people through good times and hard times. Yes, I did enjoy doing that but there was a certain void created in the sense that I left little, if any, time for myself. I will begin to change that now. I must, as a colleague of mine at the Office of Business Affairs said, pursue what I think is best for me. There are other more personal reasons for leaving the world of extra curricular and co-curricular activities. These reasons have nothing to do with the activities or even the university itself. These reasons have no place on the web so I will write no further on the topic.I have also learned quite a bit this year. Aside from my academic work, I learned that my martial arts skill should not be used carelessly. On the 27th of April, I had a martial arts demonstration on campus and the last part was to show how people sparred in martial arts. Now, my opponent was someone who trained in Korea so I thought that he would be able to take me quite easily. Little did I know that I would hit him in the face so hard! (Joshua, I am sorry about that). There was a second opponent after him who trained with me while we were in high school. This opponent was a great fighter and was much higher level than I was while in high school, so my impression was him was that he must still be good. Needless to say, I guess I must have improved quite a bit over the last four years.
Sadly, I have also learned that there are very few people in the world who will actually keep in touch when they say that they will. Perhaps the people who say this actually mean it when they say it, however, in the end, they usually do not. Maybe they’re not able to for legitimate reasons. Acquiring the skill of not being too emotionally attached to any one person or organization has been forced upon me through the experiences that I have had throughout my years. I have also learned not to let the disappointment of this fact hold me back.
Before this begins to sound like something very negative, I would like to emphasize that I have come along many people who are inherently good and wish to contribute to society along with friends. These men and women have been the inspiration for what I have done throughout my college career; from the bottom of my heart, I thank you all.
Please do not be sad that I have chosen to leave. Remember that today you might be sad but life goes on! Like any other leader, I will also be forgotten and others will outshine me. I pray for the day that many students on campus do more than what I have done and accomplish everything that I had failed to accomplish. If this happens, then there will be hope for the next generation and great prospects for society. The Asian Pacific Community especially needs more active students. Please, go out there, learn the game, and lead.
Farewell and good luck!
posted by Marcus at 7:34 PM
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